today is exactly a year since you left us Bro. A year already, although it seems like only yesterday i stood by your bedside, willing you to open your eyes and say, Hi Sis. I know you heard us all, as we tried to bring you out of the fog that surrounded your consciousness, but it was not to be. i still cant get my head round the fact that you are gone for good. it just aint right, Bro. you have no idea just how much i am missing you. i still reach for the phone to call you, at least twice a day before i catch myself and remember that you can longer answer. i know you are always around me, cos i can feel your presence and its a comfort to some extent, but i so miss you and especially not being able to talk to you or to hear your voice, just crushes me big time. i miss your laughter and your beautiful smile. i miss you telling me jokes or reminiscing about the past and discussing the future. i miss your phrases which were always unique just to you. i miss our lunch time chats and you always telling me that nothing and no-one, not even fresh-air, could ever come between us. you have left such a profound void in our lives, it is indescribable. i miss you so much Bro, it hurts, every single day. whenever i think about you not being here, i start to get really angry, cos i just want to scream out loud that you should be here, with us. it just dont seem real. it just aint right. you were always such a breath of fresh air that blew in with smiles and fun and laughter and calm serenity. i still feel like the whole of my left side is missing and catch myself looking down because i feel you standing next to me on my left side. i feel you shaking me awake when i am asleep and i feel you whispering in my ear whenever i am just sitting there thinking about you.. i hear you telling me to keep smiling despite my grief and i do try to because i want to honour your memory by being happy and positive, but its hard, very hard, at times. you were never one to be alone. you loved your family and friends around you and i will always come to visit your final resting place every year. you know that. i wanted to come today but it was not possible and i am sorry. but i will be there soon, Bro. i promise. i will still always be there for you, no matter that you are gone in body. your spirit and soul lives on with us and i will never, ever, ever, forget you. i miss you and will always love and remember you, every single day that i am blessed with life on this earth. rest in peace, Alvin. you were and still are, one in a million. the angels are that much more blessed for having you in their presence. LOVE YOU ALVIN, ALWAYS. your sister, Maureen.. xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx